Advice for getting better at networking

In a recent blog post, we focussed on the “why” of networking – and promised to explore more of the “how”. Today, we talk about some of the unwritten rules of networking, and give our own advice on the back of years of attending events and learning either from others, or from mistakes. The easiest thing to assume about networking is that it just has to “be done”, which comes with a pressure to join every group and attend everything. Whilst this can be a good strategy for larger companies with money to invest in giving people the time to do these things, and a product range which caters for every price level and needs, for smaller businesses it is far more important to strategise and

Here are 5 principles on which we approach all networking events, regardless of nature or purpose.

Be genuine and authentic

Networking is about building relationships, not just exchanging business cards. Focus on building genuine connections with people, rather than just trying to sell yourself. And whilst you’re at it, be who you really are… but with a little bit more skill: be you at your best. You are very unlikely to go on a first date with the intent to get engaged, and similarly, the first time you meet someone at a networking event, they are doing what comes naturally to humans: finding out if you are trustworthy and likeable. So, be you! We had a hilarious incident recently – our MD, Andrew, is a man of deep faith as a committed Christian… when a surveyor recently visited his house to quote for a project, he saw some Bible quote on the wall and decided to declare, “I’m a Christian too!” After a little further chatting, it became clear that that wasn’t entirely the case. The attempt to form a relationship can be respected, but really all that was needed was a genuine curiosity, showing an interest rather than going too far! “Are you guys Christians? That’s really interesting! Where do you go to church?” – normal questions asked with honest intent, which would have gone much further than spurting out an untruth.

Listen more than you talk

Show genuine interest in the other person and their experiences. Ask questions and actively listen to their responses… Again, we’re going to rope in the “date” analogy here: would you enjoy simply being told all the best reasons why that person would be an ideal partner for marriage? No, of course not. Good networking involves little more than good conversation. To boot, here’s some extra advice: if you aren’t actually interested, then just be nice. Ask questions, find out a little more, and remember that we’re all different after all. Somewhere down the line, that person may need you – you may need them. The initial conversation you had is not the be-all-and-end-all.

Follow up

After meeting someone, follow up with them to continue the conversation and build the relationship… NOT like a stalker, who constantly calls and calls, though! This could be done calmly and naturally through a personal email, phone call, or social media message / connection on LinkedIn. Here’s a sample message that I feel works well, and which (to me at least) doesn’t feel invasive or salesy: “Hi Andi, nice to meet you today. Was really interested in what you were saying about [insert topic of conversation here], and I’d be keen to connect and keep in touch with you. If you did fancy a coffee and more of a 1-1 chat at some point, let me know!” Without action of this sort being taken, you run the risk of being too easily forgotten, and then also enter the world of those awkward moments at the next event, where you both see each other but can’t quite place who each other is. This may not be the worst thing in the world, but immediately the pace at which you may be able to form a relationship that will be far slower.

Offer value

When networking, think about how you can provide value to the other person. This could be offering advice, making introductions, or sharing resources: but, at the risk of repeating myself here, NOT NOT NOT by telling them “If you pay me £XXXX I can sort that for you.” The one principle that applies here (and all the time) is being genuine. If you can honestly help that person, why would you not?

Sign up and get involved

Take advantage of networking opportunities by attending events, joining groups and organizations in your industry, and participating in online communities. Go that one step further than just being another attendee, and offer to host an event, or become a member – you will only go so far within the network if you only keep going along as a “Guest”, rather than pinning your colours to the mast and saying, “This group is something I want to be a part of.” When that commitment is made, you will start to see others opening up that little bit more to you.

CHOOSE WISELY!

This is a bonus point after the 5 above – and that is to know which networks are going to be helpful to you, and which you can offer value in return. As mentioned previously, we are proud members of BNI, however, we’d be daft to try and state that it’s the best thing for everyone. For many, the style of a BNI networking meeting, the size and type of other businesses in the room, the time that they meet, the commitment expected… it’s all too much for many solopreneurs. Additionally, only one person per industry can be a member – so if you only offer services, say, to builders, then you are actually only going to ever meet ONE builder. All this being said, BNI remains, for us, the best and most valuable form of networking locally for us and what we offer. 

Other networks will not only not have 60-second pitches, but actively discourage anything of the “self-promotion” sort, in order to focus entirely on the relationship building side of networking, with “business being done” at a later stage. This is effective, and highly enjoyable, but can take longer – not ideal for people seriously in need of quick wins and sales.

 

Need help with networking?

Please do get in touch for support with any of these areas – how to network, how to feel more confident at events, how to follow up, how to end a conversation that’s taking up too much time, which events will be right for you… any and all of it! I can promise honesty and my own personal insights, and if none of these prove helpful, I can put you in touch with people who are in a better position to provide the support you might need.